During this period the infant and the primary caregiver have a very intimate relationship. Breastfeeding, sucking (oral stimulation) and physical touch have significance, they have a symbiotic relationship. This dependence is appreciated. The infant senses that they are not separated at this stage. The sense of self will develop gradually as the mother is away more and more. This frustration will develop the baby’s capacity to be alone and self-soothe, knowing that the Mum (and the breast) will come back, i.e. trust will develop that the world is a secure place. This is also called the maturational process and it is important so that the infant’s sense of self can develop. This consistent, predictable, reliable, affectionate caregiving will help the child to develop a sense of trust, a sense of confidence that the world is a safe place, it’s also called the secure base. Lack of this can lead to mistrust, which will affect interpersonal relationships later.
A parallel can be discovered between the attitude of a reliable mother and the therapist. The mother, in an ideal situation is consistent, sensitive to the infant’s needs, present, emotionally available, has appropriate emotional responses, understands the inner world of the baby, picks on body language, can be away from time to time, just like a therapist. The therapist can provide a nurturing environment and relationship, some clients may need this type of reparenting depending on their presenting issues. The counsellor can provide the nurturing they have never had.
If the attachment is secure, due to sensitive, consistent parenting the person in later life will be able to form intimate relationships with healthy boundaries. He believes/ trusts that his needs will be met. If this stage is not negotiated well and the caregiver is unresponsive and the attachment is not secure the person will be insecure/avoidant in intimate relationships, he will shut down emotionally. He doesn’t believe his needs will be met. Alternatively people can have an insecure/ambivalent attachment pattern, when they are inconsistent in relationships, due to inconsistent parenting. A type of push and pull, inconsistent attachment occurs, they want to be close but they sabotage the relationship, too. They can’t rely on their needs being met. If the parenting was abusive or neglectful people can have an insecure/disorganised attachment style. Most people usually oscillate between different styles.
As far as the counselling relationship is concerned, clients with difficulties stemming from the oral stage might have problems in forming and sustaining a relationship. Clients may withdraw due to fear of dependency. They can be suspicious or not trusting by fearing rejection. Over dependence or over reliance can also be an issue, these clients may find it hard to end the sessions or manage breaks. They can be demanding of more time and attention. Idealising or magical expectations can also be a theme with clients instead of accepting their own responsibility for change. Alternatively, they might be even hostile, their perception can be that the counsellor is not helping. (defences)
The task of the psychodynamic counsellor working with clients who have difficulties stemming from the oral stage may be the following:
The counsellor should be reliable and consistent with the boundaries. Establishing trust is also crucial, where the client feel safe and does not fear rejection, along with exploring trust difficulties from the past. (Triangle of Insight). Encouraging positive and negative feelings towards a significant other instead of splitting is also helpful. Helping dependent clients find their self-esteem can be a goal too. Encouraging clients with positive signs of independence is also useful. Allowing the client to express their anger and frustration and containing these negative feelings can also be healing. With seriously disturbed clients assessing risk and exploring previous psychiatric history is crucial and the planning of appropriate help, too.
Bibliography:
Jacobs, M. (2012) The Presenting Past: The Core Of Psychodynamic Counselling And Therapy, Open University Press
Erikson’s Eight Stages of Development:
https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/psychpedia/erikson-eight-stages-development
https://www.simplypsychology.org/Erik-Erikson.html
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